Hey. It’s me, your island friend, coming to you with some heartfelt words from the beautiful shores of St. Maarten. Today, I want to share with you something that has been on my mind lately. I even made a short video on my Island Girl Awakening Instagram account recently on this topic. What has been on my mind is this:
Doing things even when you’re scared.
A year ago, I made one of the hardest decisions of my life. I separated from my husband, and that decision launched me into a journey of healing, personal growth, and self-empowerment I never could have imagined, and never thought I needed. Along the way, I’ve learned a thing or two, especially about facing fears and going after the life you truly want.
Let’s be honest, breakup, divorce, and separation all have one thing in common; they catapult you into a new world, whether you’re ready or not They yank you from the comforts of the life you used to know and dump you into a life you usually did not sign up for.
But let’s talk about fear, shall we? Fear has a sneaky way of holding us back from our dreams. Whether you want to enter that brave new world after a divorce or you want to to start that new business, fear whispers doubts into your ears, and tells you you’re not good enough, not brave enough. It cripples you into believing that you are not worth pursuing what you want in life. But guess what? I’ve learned that fear doesn’t have to have the final say. You can do it and you can do it scared. Here’s how:
Acknowledge Your Fear
First thing’s first, know that it’s okay to feel scared. Recognize that fear is a natural emotion, but it doesn’t have to control you.
Fear after all is just a reaction to you stepping outside of your comfort zone. You are leaving the comfortable behind to step into the new. Your brain doesn’t recognize this new thing youre about to step into and perceives it as a threat.
What if I tell you that your body doesn’t know the difference between being scared and being excited? The same symptoms that happen when your scared (and I’m not talking about life threatening moments) are the same exact symptoms you feel when you’re excited, from sweaty palms to your heart beating fast.
Visualize Your Goals
Close your eyes and picture what you want your life to look like. Visualize yourself achieving your dreams, feeling fulfilled and happy. Feel the feelings you will feel once you have achieved what you want. Is it freedom, independence, pride, happiness? Let that vision propel you forward, even in the face of fear.
This is where meditation and journaling can help.
Break it Down
Big goals can feel overwhelming. So, break them down into smaller, manageable steps. Focus on one step at a time, and before you know it, you’re making progress.
Start by visualizing the work you need to do to get there and break it down into smaller, bite-sized activities that you can do in a day or a few hours. Include these mini-goals in your daily to-do list and check it as done at the end of the day. There is no better feeling than achieving a goal, no matter how small. And just like that, your main goal or dream doesn’t seem so scary and unattainable anymore.
Seek Support
I went at it alone but I realize that not everyone is programmed the same way. What works for me, might not work for you. Know that you don’t have to do it alone unless you want to.
Reach out to friends, family, or a supportive community for encouragement and guidance. But make sure these are people that have your back no matter what.
Surround yourself with people who believe in you, even when you’re struggling to believe in yourself, and stay away from the nay-sayers and those that opt to always see the negative in things. These people will only hinder your progress.
Practice Self-Compassion
Be kind to yourself, especially when you’re feeling scared or uncertain. Treat yourself with the same love and compassion you would offer to a dear friend.
Rome wasn’t built in one day. So, if your fears were too big today and they stopped you from making any progress, forgive yourself and try again tomorrow.
Take Action
Ultimately, the only way to overcome fear is to face it head-on and take action. Start small if you need to, but take that first step. The more you confront your fears, the less power they will have over you.
Celebrate Your Wins
Every victory, no matter how small, deserves to be celebrated. Take time to acknowledge your progress and pat yourself on the back for having the courage to move forward.
A win is a win. Even if that win was just you getting out of bed today. Be grateful for the wins, no matter how small.
Babe, I know it may seem so hard and daunting right now. But imagine if you never take the steps you need to take to get to the other side. Do you rather live in regret or be proud that you at least gave it a try? Besides, what is the worst that could happen? Ask yourself that. A lot of times our fears create monumental nightmare situations that are so far from what the reality can be.
So, there you have it, my friend. The next time fear comes knocking at your door, remember: you can do it scared. Take a deep breath, summon your courage, and take that leap of faith. Who knows what amazing adventures await you on the other side?
If you need help at any time navigating the insecurities of life or career, know that I am here and I’m all too happy to have a chat with you and be there to hold your hand through it all. Book a Free Discovery Call today or join me at one of my Retreats in the Caribbean.
Until the next post, keep shining bright!
